You asked, didn't you?

The craziest thing happened yesterday. My principal asked if she could walk with me as I went down to pick my class up from specials. Of course I nodded yes-- really, what can you say? So even though I was pretty sure I hadn't done anything wrong, I was just a tad nervous. I have limited personal social skills and I can easily do the wrong thing in a heartbeat without a clue that I just stepped in it up to my chin... (I really should start carrying waders around at work)...
She asked about a meeting that she had today for the Texas Collaboratives for Excellence in Math and Science Teaching of which our school has been a member for several years because of my involvement. Now, let me make this perfectly clear. My principal never ASKED me to do this. I have always wanted to do it. And frankly, I never asked her if I could do it, I just did it. And because she really is an incredible principal and has excellent interpersonal skills, she's always gone along with it. It has several requirements that while not too onerous, does take me out of the classroom for three days a year and she has to agree to certain other commitments like allowing me to train the other teachers at my school with what I have learned during the 105 hours of professional development that I commit to. It's not too bad, and I certainly feel that the benefits to our school outweigh any inconveniences (like Saturday and after school meetings). At any rate, the meeting that Mrs. S had to attend was the "Come to Jesus or be damned" meeting that was required of all principals who perhaps had not had the training given at their schools this year. Yes, that means that even though I was on the Campus Action Plan to provide training, I had not been given the time to train the teachers. Now, I know that it doesn't sound good, but it's not as bad as it seems. I knew perfectly well that Mrs. S was looking out for her teachers and she saw that our new curriculum was forcing us to work double time and overtime. Rightly, she decided to NOT train teachers on any new science strategies and so I haven't been able to meet that expectation of the Collaborative.

Knowing all of this, I warned her what kind of meeting she might be involved in and I told her that while I had not done any school wide training that she should not feel that she has not supported the Collaborative. I mentioned that 2nd grade was the only grade level that was providing Science Support Sessions and those sessions were offered at our school through her willingness to host these meetings and allowing me to offer them at our school. I reminded her that she really did do a lot for her teachers, one of those things being that she saw we were overwhelmed by the curriculum demands this year and to not feel bad for shielding her school.

Then she thanked me for my honesty.

What did I say?

I suddenly felt like a character in an anime cartoon. I know my face must have gone white, my eyes probably got as big as dinner plates and my mouth fell open and bounced off the floor. "What?", I gasped. She repeated that she appreciated that I expressed what I felt. I was completely dumbfounded...was I supposed to LIE? That thought had never even occurred to me... why would anyone ask me something if they didn't want to know what I thought? I REALLY, REALLY thought I was tactful. I didn't swear or use inappropriate language-- that I remember, anyhow...I mean, sometimes something slips out, but I was pretty sure that my language filter was screwed on tight... I have no idea what I said-- or even if I said something wrong... I asked her if I hurt her feelings and she said no, absolutely not... so where does the honesty comment come in? I always tell the truth as I see it...

How awkward.

I hate when I do this...


and I don't even know what I did!